Surrender.

"Life had taught me undeniably that surrender, in its place, was as honorable as resistance, especially if one had no choice."
~Maya Angelou~

It seems to be quite easy to isolate oneself living in this urban area, despite the fact that we are always surrounded by people. I often think about how crazy it is that I can spend a day on subways and walking through crowded streets without saying a word to or even making eye contact with someone. There is a general understanding that we are all self sufficient and we don't need or want to take time from our valuable day to muster up the energy to send a smile or a good morning our neighbors way before heading off to work.

As self sufficient individuals, we have developed ideas of what we want our lives to be, and we work tirelessly to control our circumstances to try to stuff our lives into the molds that we have created. We can spend so much time thinking about our goals, what we want our relationships to look like and how we want to live that we forget to engage and find meaning in each day and interaction that is given to us. It is only when things are not going the way we want them to, when a sudden change or challenge is brought into our lives that we realize this is not the way we are called to live, that we can't at all do this on our own.

I had the opportunity to hear Rick Warren speak about Jeremiah 29 this past Sunday. He mentioned the fact that often, God brings us into times of waiting and transition to teach us about trusting in Him and to learn what it truly means to have faith in His promises. He spoke about tangible and significant ways we can respond to these times and find hope for the the days ahead (http://lowermanhattanchurch.com/media.php?pageID=5).

I can see that God has brought me into this time of waiting for my work visa to show me that the way I have been living my life needs to change. He is teaching me that only through having faith that He WILL provide can I find peace. I am beginning to see that surrendering my hopes, goals and future to Him is the only way to live as a child of God. While reflecting on all of this last night (during our 16 mile run, which went very well!) and today, I received the news that I can return to work tomorrow! While we are still waiting for the final documents to be processed, I am permitted to to begin teaching sixth grade again. Just in time to pay October rent. God is good.

I hope and pray that I can take what God has taught me during this time of waiting and continue to surrender all to Him. Rick spoke at the end of his message about the fact that, as Christians, God has promised that goodness and mercy will follow us all of the days of our lives. Even though I will continue to make mistakes, and I will continue to have times that I fall away from God, His grace covers me and His goodness follows me. My prayer is that God will continue to work in my life, continue to break those molds and expectations that I set for myself and others and cover me with His grace and goodness.


Jeremiah 29:11-13
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."